Honest New Year’s Resolutions

You might already now that ‘goals‘ aren’t at all what I am about, so I usually don’t make new year’s resolutions. What’s the point of resolutions when I know I won’t keep them? For this year, I thought I’d give it another try and honestly think about next year…

IMG_0681_bearb

Me trying to look out thoughtfully into the distance.

1. Only do the things I like. (Unless I have to help a loved one or get tons of money for it)
2. Quit smoking.
2. Not quit smoking. Maybe smoke a little less. At least use an electric cigarette when I’m sick.
3. Have an actual art show, even if it’s just a tiny one.
4. Find out what I wanna do with my life.
4. Get a clearer picture of what I wanna do with my life.
5. Get over my fucking anxieties. Or at least, learn to manage them better.
6. Maybe move to some other place for some time. Find out if I’m unhappy or if the city I live in makes me unhappy.
7. Stop giving a fuck.
7. Stop giving a fuck (even more than 2017).
8. Give myself the time I need for, well, everything.
9. Keep making art and designing t-shirts. Maybe sell them at a local design market.
10. Go to the gym more often. If I have time. As long as there’s nothing better to do, maybe.
11. Use social media less. Focus on who is physically in my life.
12. Still use social media to keep in contact with friends living abroad.
13. Start being on time for work. Or better yet, figure out ways for my boss not to realize how late I actually am.
14. Give up on my new year’s resolutions because they imply I don’t already try to be a better person.
15. Have fun. Have sex. Enjoy life. Stop worrying.
(16. Still make enough money not to get evicted.)

A question to all fellow Trainwrecks: Do you believe in the usefulness of resolutions? And if you had to summarize everything you want to achieve in 2018 in one sentence, how would you do it?

sebaso

Photo by Sebaso

Re-Read 2017:
The Dark Side of Social Media – Part 1
Strange things I’ve learned in Indochina | Part 1
I’ll miss you, Chester Bennington
Losing friends
Masturbation-Work-Life Balance
Sexuality as a spectrum
All gays have fetishes. And you do too.
Dear straight men, …
Top 10 Best LGBT Music Videos

Title photo by Christian Schnettelker

 

 

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40 thoughts on “Honest New Year’s Resolutions

  1. Ding Dong The Divorce is Done says:

    Honestly, I haven’t made a New Year’s resolution for many years because I find myself breaking them and then the guilt of being a failure for breaking one of the things on my list is overwhelming. It’s like when I use to participate in Lent…..ya know, giving up something for 40 days, yeah that didn’t work either.

    Now, I just make a promise to myself to live my authentic truth. It’s easier to remember than then twenty things that I listed during a drunken one night stand with a piece of paper and a pen.

    With that promise to myself I will be able to hold myself accountable and it really is a great challenge to live by every day.

    Liked by 3 people

    • benleander says:

      Thank you for your thoughtful input! True, it’s not a great feeling not to live up the resolutions set up. On the other hand, making up resolutions makes you wanna achieve them – so I’m a little torn.

      Writing this list, my conclusion was not to start the year by stressing myself with crazy goals. Being happy with life and with myself is probably the best thing that can happen, no matter if I live up to my other resolutions!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Wind Kisses says:

    Love your list Ben. 7 is right on, but my favorite was 11/12 combined. It is nice when we have the presence of physical beings in our life, but with some many important people away from our reach, social media is a gift. Happy New Year. Donna.

    Liked by 2 people

    • benleander says:

      You may be right. Resolutions like maintaining a healthy lifestyle aren’t the worst place from where you can start a year. As long as you’re not too hard on yourself and don’t set crazy goals, everything’s fine, I guess.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Claudia says:

    Well, since you’ve seen my resolutions (why bother ) and I’ve seen yours, I say we meet in the middle…don’t make any, and if you do, don’t waste any emotions worrying about it if you break them.

    Liked by 2 people

    • benleander says:

      ‘You show me yours, I’ll show you mine’ 😀
      Good idea. I mean, we’re kinda already there: You have no resolutions which I think is a good idea and I only have some resolutions and I won’t be heartbroken if I break them. Okay, who am I kidding, when I break them.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Kyla Matton Osborne says:

    I’m not big on setting resolutions for the whole year, though I do like to try and at least have one or two positives in mind for the fresh start that a new year represents. If that makes any sense. I also like the idea of adding positives to my life instead of trying to ban negatives. But life can be pretty unpredictable, so I don’t want to write anything in cement.

    Liked by 2 people

    • benleander says:

      I understand you very well. That’s pretty much how I handled my resolutions before other blogs made me write a list as an end-of-the-year post. I agree that’s it’s not a great idea to set harsh goals but having a couple of positive things in mind surely isn’t the worst thing to do.

      Like

  5. Cassie says:

    I love your honesty! It’s important to be realistic or else you’re setting yourself up for failure. I usually make a New Years resolution that is unrealistic and end up disappointed. I am going to try your method this year. Happy new year! 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • benleander says:

      I’m happy you responded you positively to this post! Happy New Year too 🙂 I wish zou all the best concerning your resolutions but more than anything that you’re disappointed if you break them!

      Like

  6. Rosey says:

    I don’t usually make resolutions at the new year. I did last year though, and I have for this year too. 🙂 Good luck to you with yours, and good luck to me with mine too. 🙂 Happy New Year!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Enjoyfreebies says:

    I love this post! I don’t really believe in resolutions. Basically, the older I get, the less fucks I give. If I had a resolution, it would be to make it through this next year without killing someone (either accidentally or intentionally). Also, I quit smoking a few years ago and now chain-vape. In fact, I vape more now than I ever smoked cigarettes. Problem is I still love cigarettes, but vaping at least smells better. Good luck to you in 2018. I look forward to reading more posts from you in the future!

    Liked by 1 person

    • benleander says:

      Not giving is always on top of my list (Or in this case, in the middle)! Maybe I’ll try vaping again this year… At least, when I’m sick. I’m looking forward to seeing more from you and welcoming you here again! Also, good look at not killing anyone. Lowering expectations for 2018, anyone?

      Like

  8. Kaitlynn says:

    I really appreciate the raw honesty in your resolutions. Your worry free mantras are quite inspiring and comically expressed. #13 is my favorite. However, I am a list person and highly motivated by setting goals for myself so I’m not sure if I’d be able to have this attitude for myself. I feel like we are polar opposites haha

    Liked by 1 person

    • benleander says:

      Yeah, I just sometimes wish it was comedy and not my real life, e.g. with #13 haha! You could try to cut down goal-making and planning – you could even make a blog post out of it. ‘How I survived without my calendar for 1 week’ – I’d read that!
      Thanks for the feedback 🙂

      Like

  9. Laura Dove says:

    Hahah number 7 made me laugh out loud, I love this post and I love your honesty. I think way too many people set unrealistic goals for the new year, the truth is we all know what we should be doing to get healthy and get our life in order, but it’s not always realistic to think we are going to do those changes over night!

    Liked by 1 person

    • benleander says:

      You’re right! New Year’s resolutions feel like a diet I’m gonna break because they’re too strict! I need lazy cheat days from my life and I don’t want to put pressure on myself with unrealistic goals. That’s my goal for 2018… No pressure! (#yolo)

      Like

  10. Patricia-Ann Que says:

    thank you for your honesty and personally, im not into resolutions but more reaching for goals. they are similar someway I guess and how do i do about it? I tell my family and friends as they help me achieve it! wishing u the best for 2018!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. lexieanimetravel says:

    I haven’t listed all my resolutions for this year yet but I have already said some to my hubby (haha) I hope to do it really. Mine are very simple but difficult for me to do cause of super busy schedules. Thanks for sharing with us your resolutions glad to know that you quitted smoking 🙂 cheers!

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Ruth I. says:

    I don’t have new year’s resolutions. I used to list some when I was younger but now I focus on creating goals I want to achieve every month or year. I also need to lessen my social media use and spend more time with family.

    Like

    • benleander says:

      Thanks! I hope so too but more than anything I wish for 2018 to be a better year than 2017. And starting with #14 I don’t really have to stress about my resolutions 😉
      Happy New Year!

      Like

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